Author: Magda Z.
" Legs as thin as holders in inkwells of black shoes. A dress made of dark fabric, still too big, probably from Marysia's sister. A double string of short beads around the neck and Maria Dąbrowska's fringe. Nothing about this child foreshadowed the beauty of the pin-up girl she would transform into in the 1950s, " Magdalena Grzebałkowska described five-year-old Zosia in the photo.
Zosia Helena was born on March 25, 1928 in Dynów, the daughter of Stanisława and Jakub Stankiewicz. The family lived in a one-room tenement house with a kitchen and no bathroom. The balcony of their house was decorated with a sign from an iron and fuel shop run by parents who were active members of the rosary group. Zosia grew up in a modest and pious home.
As a teenager, she struggled with a crooked bite complex - which Zdzisław apparently loved - but she didn't get braces until the 1980s, while living in Warsaw. Despite her self-doubt, she grew up to be a beautiful and talented student of Roman studies at the Jagiellonian University. It was during her student days that she met her future husband, who studied architecture at the polytechnic.
Zdzisiek wrote about her: Their daughter (my wife) studied against their [parents'] will, because she was supposed to take care of the farm, and her older sister, who had a better school certificate, was intended to study. Her older sister envied her beauty .
Although the young artist was not considered to be effusive, he was crazy about Zofia. Emil Kuc reports their relationship : [...] was Zosia in love with Zdziś? [in my opinion] she wasn't in love the way young girls fall in love, head over heels [...]. Zdziś, however, was possessed. He was so jealous of her that he didn't even let her get her master's degree. He loved her in his own way, but he was incredibly possessive about it . Zosia was a very cheerful girl, she liked to dance, she danced fantastically, but Zdzisio never danced with her. He was a temperamental boy, so he wouldn't forgive it. He and Zosia locked themselves in the bathroom, there were no other opportunities .
The prose of life and the smell of cake
Zofia and Zdzisław's love was a civil wedding, which took place on April 30, 1951 in Dynów (the couple had a church wedding on August 11, 1951 in Kraków). Interestingly, the painter, known for filming everyday life, did not provide his wife with a wedding photo - he lent his camera to a friend who forgot to take it to church. After getting married - according to Emil Kuc - Zosia came to Zdzisław and they lived in the WSK housing estate in Rzeszów in terrible conditions. Toilet, kitchen, everything shared. It was called a workers' hotel, but it was actually barracks .
In 1954, Zdzisław started working as a building inspector in Sanok, but he resigned from his position a year later. After his departure, the spouses moved to the Beksiński family residence, becoming an inseparable duo in every aspect of life. Although it may seem that Zofia played a supporting role to her husband, many believed that she was the real driving force in their household.
The Beksiński house was a haven for friends and acquaintances, whom Zofia always welcomed with warmth and hospitality. She offered them Marago coffee, tea, wine and delicious donuts from Blikle. She baked plum cakes, cooked Zdzisław's favorite dumplings with potatoes and cream, darned clothes, and crocheted. Although more emotional than her husband, she was taciturn. She liked the wind in her hair when her husband took her on motorcycle trips, and she enjoyed going to the cinema. She got a driving license for her husband so that she could act as his driver.
I'm just embarrassed that you think I'm such a good wife, because I'm convinced that I'm not. I believe that a great individual should not be alone, but should have with him even a smaller one, but also some individuality, and I am only a shadow. I have no artistic inclinations, I don't have the slightest talent in any field, I don't even have a profession that would allow me to support myself. So I'm more of a burden. My little advantage - if you can call it that - is probably the fact that I am not demanding. I do what I can, I don't complain about anything, they remember, that's good, no, that's good too, and that's how life goes . – Zofia Baczyńska
Butterfly with the wind in its wings
For Beksiński, she was the greatest muse - he passionately photographed her shapely body, created portraits with a spark in his eye. She did not fully understand the dark art of her brilliant husband, but she humbly fulfilled his artistic whims. And she supported Zdzisław. In December 1958, moved by one of his early exhibitions, she said: I'm afraid they will make fun of you too much. And that all your contribution, both spiritual, physical and material, will bear some fruit. So that all this doesn't disappoint you .
Did she sacrifice herself for Zdziś? As a family friend said: Zosia was a loving person. She knew that he was an artist and she knew why she sacrificed herself [although] [...] I wouldn't use such a word, because if you love someone, you do it to make him happy [...], especially since Beksiński did nothing he did not demand from Zosia [...]. So it was her decision. She was […] completely devoted to him – and for her it was something natural and beautiful .
Many of the photographs Zdzisław took of her have stood the test of time. Unfortunately, some of them from the 1950s were destroyed by Zofia, and the artist, respecting his wife's will, burned the negatives after her death. In his diary, he expressed sadness over the loss of photos in which Zosia looked particularly beautiful (1953–1955). And when she stood behind the camera, he made sure that her signature appeared on the photos.
Mother – a working woman
On November 26, 1958, Zofia welcomed her son - Tomasz Sylwester. He weighed three kilograms and one hundred grams and was 52 cm tall. She considered Tomasz the most beautiful child in the world, while Zdzisław spoke openly about his fear and slight revulsion towards children. He played the role of a friend rather than a parent; Growing up, Tomasz lamented that his father allowed too much and never had the courage to discipline him.
As Thomas was consumed by darkness, Zofia stood by him with unwavering patience and empathy. She supported him in his struggles and admired his work on radio. Zdzisław talked about Zofia's low self-esteem and the sense of failure that he believed Tomasz had inherited from her. However, in the memories of Tomek's friends, Zofia is remembered as an eternally cheerful, understanding and tender woman.
She was not just a muse, a housewife or a mother. She tried to support the family budget financially. It is worth noting that Zdzisław took up various jobs, including construction, because his works began to be sold only in 1973, as a result of which the family struggled with financial problems. For some time, Zofia Beksińska worked as a secretary at the Pedagogical Secondary School in Sanok at ul. Lipiński, and then gave private lessons in French, which she loved and where she read her favorite magazines. At the end of 1964, she charged PLN 20 per hour for a lesson and had four students. In a letter to Jerzy Lewczyński, Zdzisław mentioned that she put a lot of effort into preparing for classes, often working late into the night.
Zofia's intense lifestyle took a heavy toll on her health. From the beginning of her marriage, she suffered from tuberculosis, and despite her inner strength, her psyche made itself felt. Lewczyński wrote: At times I thought that Zosia was taking something, she had such depressive states. In the evening everything was fine, but then in the morning he didn't get up and lay in bed all day .
After treatment in Zakopane and Kraków, she cured the disease. However, health problems returned over time in the form of an aortic aneurysm. Knowing that the chances for effective treatment were slim, Zofia began to prepare her husband for single life. She realized that until now, mundane tasks had not occupied his attention and that it was time for her husband to learn to cope with responsibilities such as laundry, housework, and taking care of himself and his son. She died on September 22, 1998 after 47 years of marriage. A year later, Tomasz joined his mother and committed suicide. Six years after his death, Zdzisław Beksiński was murdered in his apartment in Warsaw. The entire family was buried in the family tomb at the cemetery in Sanok.